<<<I used to be painfully, painfully shy.>>>
The truth is, I still am to some extent. But I’m getting better! Growing up, I always had the same core group of friends, but once we all went to college, I pretty much only had my boyfriend at the time to rely on. After a year of really feeling like I had no identity of my own (other than being so-and-so’s girlfriend), the last straw was realizing that I had no one to live with my sophomore year. At my college, freshman year was the year of the dorms and then by the end, you’d met your future apartment roomies. Not for me. I finally made it my mission to meet some friends! I knew that I had to start putting myself out there in order to not continue to feel miserable. So while I wasn’t thrilled that I had to spend another year in the dorms, it ended up not being the worst thing in the world because since I was newly single, I was forced to get to know the girls on my floor and start to make plans. This really helped me start to gradually chip away at my shell. Eventually, by the end of college, I had made some close friends and was working at a restaurant full of cool people, so there was never a shortage of parties and get togethers to attend. I still never really felt like I fit in anywhere, but I did meet a best friend or two out of my whole college experience!
Now, I’m living in a brand new city, and I sort of feel like it’s freshman year of college all over again. Now, I’m married, but just like in college, all my friends seem to stem from Brett. Part of me feels like I’m “so-and-so’s
girlfriend wife” again. And while I know that it’s perfectly normal to not know a soul when you move to a new city, let alone across the country, I’m still trying to fight my way out of that shell. Just like in college, I still don’t really fit in anywhere, and even though I’ve met a couple of cool ladies, I still don’t have those “bestie” girlfriend relationships yet. And it’s totally my fault. I could join a gym. I could volunteer somewhere. I could get a “normal” office job. But like a true introvert, I value my alone time. It doesn’t bother me….until it does bother me. If that makes sense. Obviously only time will tell, and ultimately, it’s up to me to keep chipping away at that damn shell.
What about you? What are you working on? What have you conquered? Any other shy sistahs out there?
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